Relinquishing the Task Master: Finding True Worth in Who You Are and Whose You Are

Hey Friends,

Recently, I’ve been thinking a lot about relinquishing the need to be a “task master” and the reasoning behind it. To be clear, I’m not referencing a task master in a good sense.

What’s that? You don’t know what a task master is? A task master is used figuratively to describe someone who drives themselves or others hard to accomplish goals, according to Webster. However, when I say task master, I’m referencing someone who consistently checks off lists of things they feel need to be done in specific areas—all with the end goal of feeling valued or earning their worth and love from others.

At some point in my life, I believed that I had to do “things” to be worthy, loved, or accepted. I created checklists for myself in various areas, convincing myself that if I completed my list, I would be noticed by the right people, loved by those same people, and worthy of all that God had to give. Thinking back on it, it was such a crazy time. Who made me the queen of the to-do list? And why did EVERYTHING need checks and balances in that regard? I remember during this phase I felt very depleted—constantly giving and doing for an end that never came.

Hindsight: people couldn’t fulfill what I needed no matter how hard I tried to perform for them.

Have you ever been there? Felt the need to “do” for acceptance, love, acknowledgment, or justification? Don’t even get me started on the overextension that comes with this need.

Actually, maybe I should get started.

What I learned during that time is that not only do you exhaust yourself trying to earn something that is freely given by God, but you also become performance-driven, defining yourself by the works you do. There’s an overextension that almost always accompanies the checklist because there are no lengths you won’t go to in order to “feel” like you’ve done a good job. And once you’ve achieved that, you think you’re now accepted, loved, or worthy.

This mindset will leave you drained, questioning your identity. You may even believe that your value is tied to your productivity or the approval of others. But here’s the thing—your true worth has never been in what you do. It's in who you are and whose you are. God already sees you as worthy, loved, and enough, regardless of what you check off on your list.

If you’ve ever found yourself here, let me tell you: it’s okay to let go of the need to perform. Ephesians 2:10 reminds us, "For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do."This verse reinforces that we are His creation, designed for purpose, but our worth is not tied to our works—it’s tied to who we are in Him.

I can't say this enough :

Your works don’t make you worthy—you already are. Take a moment to reflect on this truth and let it settle in your heart.

As you move forward, remember that your value doesn’t come from how much you do but from who you are. And in the eyes of God, you are already enough. Learn to rest in His love and remember who you are in Him—fully loved, deeply valued, and more than enough.

Here's to relinquishing the performative need, embracing who we truly are, and resting in the freedom that comes with knowing our worth is already secured in Him.

Let's Chat Soon!

The Light Coach ✨

HH 💚